Long time, no blog. Well, there are a few reasons for that:
- Lazy. Lazy lazy lazy.
- I’m writing some other things, and fiction takes a completely different type of emotional energy.
- I also have a pretty complex screening system for subjects that I will write about, and no ideas have really made it through that screening system recently. A lot of stuff hits the screen and bounces off, though.
So, here we are. I had a thought today that made it through the screen – it’s a short one, but I thought it was worth sharing:
There are mindsets and there are lenses.
A mindset, in my view, is more like an ideology, a set of beliefs that guides how we navigate our lives. But what I want to talk about are our lenses:
I think of a lens as a stage in life that informs how we interpret the world, not necessarily how we act upon it.
Example: As a student, I interpreted the world through the “student” lens. This lens dictated my concerns, my goals, my schedule, and my peer group. I viewed the world as a student would: the endless possibilities, optimism, and excitement.
There are married lenses, single lenses, parent lenses, grandparent lenses, sibling lenses, grief lenses, and even subsets of these lenses.
- New wife lens
- New husband lens
- New parent lens
- Parent for the third time lens (quite different, so I hear)
- Early 20s single lens
- High school student lens
- New employee lens
- Retiree lens
You get the idea. So why am I writing this?
It’s just something we need to be mindful of as we interact. I certainly need to remember this. Let’s not be dismissive – granted, we will probably fail now and then. But let’s try.
Married people: We need to not be dismissive of the single lens. Which means that we don’t treat it like a cancer that maybe people will be someday delivered from. Single people are doing just fine.
Single people: Married people sometimes know stuff, too. Don’t get disgusted with us just because we are sometimes incredibly annoying. Okay, go ahead and get disgusted, but don’t throw things. Please.
Parents: Not everybody loves children. That’s okay. Some people may choose to never have any. That’s also okay.
People who aren’t parents: Kids are cool. Chill. They won’t ruin your life. In fact, they can immeasurably enrich it.
And so on.
And remember, a lens isn’t a mindset. It’s a period in time, a fact, and sometimes, they overlap. Sometimes, they last for the duration of a person’s life – after all, a parent never stops being a parent.
Just some food for thought.
What are your lenses right now?