As I read back over my posts, I sometimes wonder if the image I’ve painted of myself here is authentic.
Of course, it wasn’t ever going to be, completely. I had no intention of subjecting the world to my unedited thoughts. What I’m thinking of specifically, though, is my faith.
I come off as a bit of a cynic, but I don’t think that’s altogether accurate. Understand that I do love examining Christian culture and turning my own beliefs inside out over and over again.
But the truth remains: I believe in God. I believe that Jesus Christ is the way to the Father. I believe he sacrificed himself for my sins (my criticism, anger, distrust, fear) so I could be saved and live forever in heaven with him. I don’t even completely understand all the implications of this, but there it is.
That might sound insane to you – it sounds insane to me sometimes. But the thing is, I no longer have the luxury of not believing he’s real. Because I’ve met him – I’ve heard his voice. And accompanying that voice was something I can only describe as an all encompassing powerful wave of love that cut to the very core of my heart.
God is a God of love, and he exists. You can call me crazy, and I’ll understand.
But no matter what you think of us flawed Christians, don’t let that color the way you look at God. Forgive us our flaws, and don’t allow us to obscure him from your view.
He is. And he is good. He exists outside of time, outside of your expectations and your ideas. He’s so much better than any concept you or I could make up.
You might be angry with him. (I’ve been there.) You might be upset because he doesn’t seem to believe in the same things you do. Or maybe you struggle with some parts of the Bible (again, me too).
Instead of simmering, ask him. Talk to him. Pray out loud in the car. Ask the questions you want to ask. YELL at him if you want. He can take it.
Then wait and see.